***I'd like to welcome a new writer to this little thing of ours, "Cpt. America". Don't snicker, I gave him the nickname, he didn't choose it.***
[ Note: The author has travelled throughout East Asia during the last 10
years. He is writing about his personal experiences and observations. ]
He called the Hotline phone-number that a friend told him about. He called from a payphone near the train-station, and stammered out his question to
the operator on the other end, "Can I get my mother pregnant if we have sex
without a condom?" This boy is part of a growing social group in Japan -
high-school aged boys who are being pushed into sex by their mothers.
Pushed into sex with their mothers.
The scenario above is part of the evolving face of Japan: the strict,
'silent' culture meeting modern openness to discuss topics that used to be
taboo. High-school students are known to be under tremendous pressure to
succeed scholastically, both at school, and at the infamous College Entrance
Exam. Doing well on the exam is viewed as leading to an enviable,
comfortable life. Failure is something that many fear, some parents fear it
perversely.
In the desire to see that their son does well, a growing number of mothers
have taken it upon themselves to alleviate the stress their adolescent boys
feel. As the mothers see it, by providing 'relief' for their sons the boys
are better able to study for their exams - and their future. While many
incidents are told of mothers simply providing fellation, there is a growing
number of young boys engaging in intercourse with their own mothers.
Statistics are always difficult to gather on topics such as this. Many of
the counseling agencies that deal with issues such as this are reluctant to
paint too literal a picture of the problem, for fear of driving future
clients away due to lack of confidentiality. Several telephone 'hotlines'
around Japan recently reported that the scenario from the first paragraph
has become a recurring phenomenon. Even 5 years ago there would be one call
per month to discuss such incest activity. But today some agencies admit to
nearly two calls a week.
What is most surprising (from my American point of view) is the quiet
acceptance of the problem. Reports of activity like this are quietly
reported in the local papers and the locals quietly admit that it is not
right. Many people are disgusted by the problem (as they would be in the
west), but the Japanese penchant for 'not rocking the boat' gives the
appearance of acceptance.
The mothers involved believe they are helping their children, the fathers
often seem aware of the situation and condone it. Which seems to be part of
the larger problem. It is no secret that Japanese marriages are thought of
as being 'sex-free' for the couple. The vast majority of interviewed
couples admit they no longer have sex - at all - as soon as 5 years into a
marriage. It is not unusual for a married couple to not sleep in the same
room.
One unfortunate scenario was recently described in a local paper. The
mother caught the son masturbating and she wanted to 'provide relief'. When
the wife confronted the husband with her idea, he said it was OK with him as
long as there was no intercourse. And with her husband's permission the
wife/mother began her work.
The boy will take his entrance exams next year. No word on how he might do.
But his family is helping him out as best they can.